Not really up to writing a lot about it right now, but just got back from an impromptu trip to Omaha to see my mom. We're down to her last days.

My friends, Alzheimer's is a damned horrific nightmare. If I ever start looking down the barrels of that living hell, well... I wish we lived in a country where one could choose not to endure years of ever-increasing loss of self, health, and free will, knowing we cannot get better, certain that we will get worse, until one day we cannot remember our loved ones or even who we are. That, my friends, is the worst hell I can imagine. The only words Mom has formed in the past few weeks, and those were barely audible: "Have a headache."

Oof.
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From: [identity profile] sartorias.livejournal.com


I am so sorry you are going through this. Been through it will two relatives, but not a parent. Best wishes and strength to you both.

From: [identity profile] sherwood21.livejournal.com


I'm so sorry. I've known another friend who's mother passed from Alzheimer's a few years ago, and I know some of the struggles she went through. It is a difficult and heartbreaking thing to be part of.

From: [identity profile] roseconnelly.livejournal.com


I'm sorry, and I agree with you. We should have a choice about the end of our life.


From: [identity profile] mckitterick.livejournal.com


It's insensible that we don't have that option in cases like this.

From: [identity profile] kalimeg.livejournal.com


Not at all easy to face. I am sorry that you will have this memory to live with.

From: [identity profile] mckitterick.livejournal.com


These new memories just don't fit with who she was. So alien.

From: [identity profile] pointoforigin.livejournal.com


Oh my god, Chris. I'm so sorry. As you probably know, that is what my father died of, this January. Please know that I am here if you ever need to talk. And even if you don't need to talk, just know that I care and I will be thinking of you.

From: [identity profile] mckitterick.livejournal.com


Thanks so much, and I know how long it went on for your father, too. What a horrifying way to go.

From: [identity profile] saffronhare.livejournal.com


This disease soured the final years we had with both maternal grandparents. I'm so sorry to hear your family is suffering, and hope everyone has the comfort and grace they need most in the time ahead.

From: [identity profile] mckitterick.livejournal.com


On the plus side, she's not mean anymore. On the negative... well, everything else.

From: [identity profile] rougewench.livejournal.com


There are no words that can be offered that could truly provide any comfort. Late stages of cancer and late stages of Alzheimer's show us the stripped away truth of ourselves, as physical beings.

I have always believed that the most awful truth of humanity is that we are kinder to our pets than to our relatives. With our pets we are both allowed to, and encouraged to, end suffering. Humanity's blinkered belief in "God" keeps us from doing the same for those closest to us.

May she find the door from this place sooner rather than later. You truly do have my deepest empathy.


D.

From: [identity profile] mckitterick.livejournal.com


Thank you, D. I completely agree, and look forward to a day when we have freedom to choose whether or not we go on suffering when there is no end in sight, or only decline.

(And make that a world where others don't decide when to terminate you, too.)

From: [identity profile] angelmaye.livejournal.com


I occasionally read your posts on my friends of friends page.

A year ago this past weekend I sat with my grandmother as she passed out of this world after her battle with this viscous disease. I know that nothing any of us says will offer you any comfort. Just know that her suffering will end, and while it might not make you feel better, it will hopefully bring you at least a little peace and or relief. I hope you find the strength to make it through what is to come. My thoughts will be with you and your family.

A.

From: [identity profile] mckitterick.livejournal.com


Good to meet you, A., and thank you for the kind words. I'm so sorry you had to deal with this with your grandmother.
.

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